Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
