It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
