last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize