are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Randomize
