Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
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