why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize