gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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