Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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