I want to stick my p in your. b.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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