I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I supernannyed him into submission
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize