thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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