Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
