Soap is not a condiment
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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