that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want