i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
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The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
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I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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