looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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