like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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