It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
