sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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