She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
