Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
