if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize