I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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