i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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