I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
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Actions speak louder than pants.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
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He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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