id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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