This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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