just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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