his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize