Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
