Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
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My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
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Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE