you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
