i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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