this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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