go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize