just tell him i said nine months
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Randomize
