Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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