She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
