That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
