I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
