...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Randomize
