Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
