I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize