you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
A bitchslap is in order.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
