I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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