What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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