Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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