I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
