god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
