No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
